Rights of passage

On the weekend Hil and I went to the most disgusting place – likely ever. It was definitely dirtier and scarier than anything I’ve experienced, including giant rats in the basements of London hostels. That place was Phil’s.

If you went to University of Waterloo or Wilfred Laurier you know Phil’s, it’s practically on your campus. And it’s so gross.

Allow me to elaborate. Phil’s is a dance club/bar where the drinks are only $2, so of course it’s always jammed pack with partying students. You have to go down a flight of stairs to essentially party in a basement, so there’s absolutely no air flow, the ceiling looks like it will give you asbestos poisoning and the air is damp, hot, humid, and absolutely rank, because it’s so underground and so packed with bodies. The drinks come in small plastic cups without limes … ever. And at a regular club, were somebody to just chuck their cup on the ground when they’re done, they’d be a big inconsiderate jerk. But that’s just what people do at Phil’s. Nobody sets their drink down or throws their cups out, they just toss it over their shoulder and people dance on it for the rest of the night. The dregs and the ice combine to make the club just one giant puddle. You stand around in a centimetre of liquid all night. It’s not a sticky floor, it’s a wet floor. The whole place is pretty much a swamp in a cave.

Why would we go to such a hell-hole? Well, why does anybody? It’s a right of passage. If you live in Kitchener/Waterloo or if you’ve ever partied in KW/plan to, it’s just a right of passage. It’s something you just have to experience so you can say that you lived to tell the tale. Do I recommend it? Oh hair no. Are you going to go? Yup likely.

~ Julia

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2 thoughts on “Rights of passage

  1. Jillian Wood says:

    Whoa, you can’t judge Phils. You’re an outsider. It’s a magical place, and if you go enough you get used to the vomit smell. Some of the best and worst nights of my life started and/or ended there. If you wore opened toed shoes or flip flops, then that’s you’re own fault! Be sensible woman — it’s Phils for poops sake! It is what it is. It also happens to play some of the best music on Wednesday (Hip Hop night!) and what used to be Saturday night …but then they kept changing to the point where I was confused as to how I got there and I’d show up and it would be heavy metal night…Still an amazing time! (Even when that dude puked on the bar and the bartenders just wiped it off and kept going.)

    • That fully happened when I was there! Our friend charfed right at the bar and the bartenders were completely unfazed. It was horrifying and exciting. I had a truly hilarious and wonderful night – the DJ is pretty awesome – and when you experience something just so terribly disgusting you kind of walk away feeling like a survivor/like the night has been the best joke of your life. It was great! I actually had a blast. But it was terrifyingly gross. I have never been to a place to so gross. It’s the most gross.

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