Monthly Archives: October 2012

Beware: Complete Horror Within

The other day, I made the horrendous mistake of Googling camel spiders. Do it now, I dare you. [Here’s the wikipedia page to make it easier for you]. Continue reading

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Soup hoarding

To me Martha Stewart will always be that kinda crazy housewife-esque woman who had to go to prison – oh Martha – but I admit the recipe section of her website is ballin. I became absolutely obsessed with the idea of making soup, for reasons completely unknown to anybody, especially me. I found two really lovely recipes on MarthaStewart.com for a butternut squash bisque and a carrot curry soup. SO DELICIOUS. Continue reading

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Too. Much. My Brain Hurts.

Today, during the time when I would normally make an update on the blog, I read Little Women. Now, I don’t mean that I read the entire book, because I started it yesterday. That having been said, I did read approximately 200 words of the 264 page novel, so I might as well have read the whole thing. In three hours. Continue reading

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Living the dream (without becoming a mere skeleton on a sandy stretch of beach)

In university, when I had no idea what to do with myself for the rest of my life, I would say that I would graduate and be a poet living on a beach. This obviously didn’t come true or else I would, by now, be a skeleton on some sandy stretch somewhere – typically just living on a beach is illegal/dangerous and writing poetry doesn’t bring in enough money to purchase a small private island, surprisingly enough. But if you think of it in the most idyllic frame of mind, it seemed like a sweet gig. Continue reading

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Movie review: Pitch Perfect

As Hil mentioned, we saw Pitch Perfect on Tuesday and it rocked our worlds. I wish I could watch it a million more times forever until I die. I’m kind of obsessed. Continue reading

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What, what, what are you doing?

I think this video is truly hilarious. And, as someone who has read Romeo and Juliet an unfortunate number of times, it’s quite refreshing to see it being mocked so mercilessly.

Continue reading

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I’m From the Bush

Julia and I went to see Pitch Perfect earlier this week with our wonderful sister-in-law. It was a really great movie, but more on that later this week. In summary, I highly recommend.

Anyway, my favourite part of the movie was by far Rebel Wilson, who is truly hilarious. Here’s her interview with Ellen for proof:

Continue reading

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The internet is a scary, hilarious place

It’s that time again: time to share with all of you the absolutely hilarious search terms that brings readers to Sarcasm Soapbox. Seriously guys, you’re all incredibly funny. Keep up the good work! Continue reading

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The Listening Is Easy

This is to prove to you that not ALL of the music I have to listen to for my music class is as awful as Ives’s “General William Booth Enters Into Heaven” (note: William Booth is not the guy that shot Lincoln in the head, for all you wondering. That was John Wilkes Booth. No, good old Willie Booth here is the guy that started The Salvation Army. Famous for a very different reason).

See? Significantly better.

~ Hilary Lyon Axle Hatchet

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Die demon arachnid, die!

There’s a gigantic spider in my bathroom that lives in the tiny space between the sink counter and the wall and I’m completely terrified of him. He’s so large! Great black body with long legs and he scurries about incredibly quickly. I’m feeling a bit ill just typing this. Usually he just pops out of the crack in which he lives and then darts back in a flash – afraid of me as I am of him. I gasp and freeze, paralyzed with fright until I muster up the courage to move again, long after he’s disappeared from sight. The thing is, I had been letting him stay because his visits were so very infrequent and quick, and he ate all the other smaller spiders that had moved into my bathroom. It was kind of working for me. That is until this morning. Continue reading

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