There’s a girl in one of my classes who wears false eyelashes each and every single day. This amazes me. I thought I was doing pretty well, what with being able to put on real pants for class every day, but she has me considerably beaten. I generally try to look reasonably presentable when I go to school, partially because it’s really my only option (I don’t own sweat pants, they are my own personal hell), but also because I’d feel a bit weird showing up to class wearing what can essentially be worn to bed while a man in a suit spouts information at me.
This is not even the first person I’ve encountered who wears false eyelashes every single day. When I was in my very first semester of school, I took a class called The Science of Gardening. Essentially, it was me and my friend Jenna in a room full of agriculture students and a few adult students. The class was at 8:30 in the morning in a building called Crop Science, which is one of the most alarming buildings on campus. There are two entrances and if you pick the wrong one, you end up wading your way through rusty machinery covered in tarps to get to your lecture hall, which is basically just a room full of plastic tables and folding chairs.
But I digress. Every other day at 8:30 am in an agriculture building full of rusty machinery, this girl would show up in stilettos with perfectly styled hair and false eyelashes. You’ve got to admire that level of commitment. Of course, she showed up to the exam in sweatpants with her hair in a messy bun and no false eyelashes and I had no idea who she was. She was completely unrecognizable without those three extra inches of height and eyelash length.
~ Hilary Lyon Axle Hatchet