Fingerling potatoes and heirloom tomatoes (food trends are ridiculous)

Yesterday I was introduced to the world of food trends, and I’m not quite sure if I can express how incredibly silly I found it. I tend to think most trends are silly (I’m still anti-Ugg boot) but food trends seem especially silly – just because somebody tells you that cupcakes are no longer fad-worthy does that really mean you have to stop eating them and start eating bacon-flavoured donuts?

For 2013 (so I’m already behind the times) the major food trends are:

Gluten-free and ancient grains (apparently “ancient grains” are things like spelt and quinoa.)
Chicken (haven’t we been eating chicken all along? I for one never shunned a bit of chicken because it wasn’t fashionably trendy.)
Goat (Good lord.)
Homemade yogurt – not Greek or Icelandic (Apparently not only was Greek yogurt a huge trend, but Icelandic yogurt too had its time in the spotlight. This is a lie. I never once heard of, or tasted, “skyr.”)
Gochujan is replacing sriracha (I don’t know what either of those words are, and I’m embarrassed.)
Homemade flour (who has the time for that??)
Tea is the new coffee (not according to the Nutcracker)
Donuts (Because donuts are now the new cupcake)

This all means that the following fads are now passé:

Bison
Bacon
Cupcakes
Fingerling potatoes
Heirloom tomatoes

The most ridiculous thing is that 70% of the world already eats goat on a regular basis, and skyr has been part of Icelandic cuisine for over a thousand years. Quinoa is such a staple in Peruvians’ diets that our sudden infatuation with it is preventing them from being able to afford it and consume it. If you really love bacon you’re going to eat it regardless, and cultures have been drinking tea faithfully since FOREVER. These aren’t really trends, in the end, they’re just sudden infatuations with grapefruit juice, and a sudden tiring of specific potatoes. But, if you’re hell bent on trying all the newest fads, may I suggest a goat gochujan donut?

~ Julia Maurice Sabre-Ocean

p.s. Thanks for all the inspiration Jenn 🙂

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