In defense of One Direction (or at the very least, ID’s PR team)

On the weekend, a couple of us went to go see the One Direction movie. Cinematic genius it was not, so yes, you may feel free to judge me all you want. That’s cool. I get it.

And yes, they all have ridiculous, gravity defying haircuts (Louis’s is sort of a faux-hawk mullet which is unusual), their fans are the most outrageously extreme set of hysterical girls this planet has ever seen, and they don’t write any of their outrageously upbeat pop ditties. I’m aware of all these things, and more (why are Harry Styles’s pants so tight, and why does his hair look like something that’s been pulled out of a drain? Why is Zayne so moody? Why do they wear so many tank tops and beanies?) and yet I still kind of love them.

I love them because I grew up in the boy band heyday and their sugary sweet pop music makes me happy. I love them because they’re just as cute as a button. But mostly I love them because of their public image.

I’m quite sure they’ve got a super ballin’ PR team, and some very stressed out handlers working on them all the time, so their public images are probably very carefully crafted and maintained. But what comes across to the public as a result of all this is that they’re five normal English boys who enjoy goofing around and singing pop songs. Apart from the fact that they’re fabulously wealthy and relentlessly stalked everywhere they go, the just seem like these totally typical 19-year-old boys. They’re smelly, messy, silly, dumb and fun-loving.

Now contrast this with Justin Bieber. He’s this 19-year-old ass-hat. He’s up himself, he’s moody, he does incredibly stupid, reputation-damaging things (like peeing in public and trying to smuggle a monkey into Germany), and yes we can say, oh he’s young  and ridiculously wealthy, he’ll grow out of it when he adjusts to his fame, but maybe he won’t. Maybe he’s an insufferable little jerk who just happens to have a lovely voice and pretty face.

I say all of this for the entire purpose of simply noting that my love for One Direction could be worse. And also, secondarily, to encourage you to Google image photos of their hair. I don’t even understand the physics of it.

~ Julia Maurice Sabre-Ocean

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