Category Archives: Let’s Talk About…Tuesday

Let’s Talk About…Careless Whisper

Today, we’ve decided to discuss something entirely inane. If you haven’t heard George Michael’s “Careless Whisper”, you should probably watch the video now, partially because it will help you understand this, but also simply because you should just watch it.

Hilary: I’ve decided that, in “Best Song Ever”, when they say that they danced all night to the best song ever, they were definitely talking about “Careless Whisper”. There’s just no other option.

Julia: I’m sorry, are you actually trying to tell me right now that the literal best song ever is Careless Whisper? That is a bold statement, sir.

Hilary: I am trying to tell you that One Direction clearly must’ve danced all night to Careless Whisper, which they call the best song ever. I think it’s a statement just bold enough.

Julia: Ah, I see. But then that prompts a follow up question: how do you know it’s Careless Whisper and not Beethoven’s 5th?

Hilary: Because how could it not be Careless Whisper?

Julia: It could actually be anything but Careless Whisper. It could be Tibetan Monks quietly humming the Brady Bunch theme tune. Unless you know that One Direction collectively thinks that Careless Whisper is in fact the best song ever, or unless you’re willing to argue yourself that Careless Whisper is in fact the best song ever, then it could be anything, couldn’t it?

Hilary: Tbh, I think it’s a fantastic song. Its comedic value is through the roof. So much ‘80s saxophone. It makes me so happy. Also, the lines “I’m never going to dance again, guilty feet have got no rhythm” are both incredibly dumb and utterly hilarious.

Julia: Oh Careless Whisper is indeed a musical gem, but I feel like I like it ironically, which is probably not what George had in mind when he wrote it. Guilty feet are the worst, perhaps second only to guilty elbows.

Hilary: Or shameful shoulders and morose shins.

In completely other unrelated news, Julia, while discussing the fudge our roommate made, said “I’m committing to fudge. It’s my life partner and I love it. Julia + Fudge 4ever”. We are ridiculous.

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Let’s Talk About: One Direction’s Newest Album

One Direction officially released their third album, Midnight Memories, yesterday (it had been leaked way earlier than that) and we have been listening to it quite a lot since. Obviously.

Hilary: I quite like Little Black Dress.  It sounds remarkably like something Bruce Springsteen would’ve sung (in 1987) and I think we can all agree that Bruce Springsteen is awesome.

Julia: He is awesome! At first when I was listening to the full album I found it kind of disconcerting because it was so all over the place – there were 80s rock songs, folk songs, and pop songs – and it was possibly the least cohesive album I’ve ever heard. I was a bit worried that this was them, growing up a bit, trying to find their sound and failing. But when we learned that they co-wrote the majority of the songs on the album, it makes more sense! Harry and Nial wrote the folk songs, Louis and Liam wrote the 80s rock songs (who would have thought?) and the pop songs were written for them. It just makes so much more sense now.

Hilary: It really does. Zayn, it appears, had little to no involvement in the writing process. Do you know what Zayn has been doing? According to this article on Buzzfeed, he’s been tackling the overwhelming and thrilling challenge of bringing turtlenecks back to style. I have to admit, he does wear a turtleneck well. It’s really quite unusual because I have rarely seen a man in a turtleneck who was not fifty-seven and also wearing either a beret or a tweed jacket with elbow patches.

Julia: Wow, Zayn. What a spectacular use of time. He actually does look rather dapper though. And perhaps we wouldn’t have wanted him to write any of the songs because he can be notoriously moody!

Hilary: Well that’s true. I don’t want to just be depressed for the entire album. I think my favourite song by far is Happily and mostly because it’s delightfully folky. I swear there’s a banjo in there somewhere, which is remarkable for a boy band. 98° never did that! Or possibly they did. I don’t know, I never really listened to them.

Julia: There definitely is banjo in there, and I of course love it as well. Never once did O-Town play the banjo, for which we can all be extremely grateful. There are a lot of songs on this album that I think if you didn’t know it they were by 1D you wouldn’t guess that to be the case. Some, for example sound like Whitesnake. Not necessarily ideal, still enjoyable. Some like “Diana” make literally no sense at all, until you decide it’s about a cardiologist. “Let me be the one to light a fire inside those eyes,/You’ve been lonely,/You don’t even know me,/But I can feel you crying,/Diana,/Let me be the one to lift your heart up and save your life,/ I don’t think you even realize baby you’d be saving mine.” It’s so obviously about a cardiologist. If it’s not, it makes no sense at all.

Hilary: I didn’t like that song at first, but then I listened to it with the new-found knowledge that it is being sung from the perspective of a lonely cardiologist and now I love it (or at least like it slightly better than I did previously; love is a very strong word). I mean, clearly Diana is a very lonely woman with a heart condition in which her heart has fallen. This is why he’s lifting it up and consequently saving her life. And she’s obviously crying because she’s alone. And also probably having someone physically lift up your heart is quite painful.

Julia: I think it takes a lot of creativity to sing about lonely cardiologists. While still super catchy and fun, I find the lyrics to Alive deeply troubling. I honestly think that the person they’re singing about might have a mental illness and just because it makes you feel alive does not actually mean it’s ok. I can think of SO many examples where that is absolutely untrue. Heroin for one.

Hilary: I just looked up the lyrics. Judging by the first verse alone, the song is 100% about sex addictions. Also, this therapist they’re consulting should have her licence revoked. You do no say to someone who is asking why they want to be with every girl they meet, “it’s fine so long as you feel like you’re alive”. Terrible advice. Terrible, terrible advice. Also, for all the young ladies out there (and some of the older ladies as well, tbh), don’t let some guy talk you into doing something just because he swears it’ll make you “feel alive” even if he is Zayn Malik in a turtleneck. I mean, if you want to do, go for it, that’s your prerogative (just like Bobby Brown). But if you don’t, feeling alive is not a good enough reason to abandon all of your personal values.

Julia: Good, solid advice. The seductive powers of a turtleneck know no ends. RESIST!

Hilary: Well, the seductive powers of a turtleneck on Zayn knows no ends. It think there are definite ends to the seductive powers of a turtleneck on, say, Jack Nicholson. Or my grade eleven chemistry teacher. Her turtlenecks did not make crucibles anymore thrilling than they already were (re: weren’t).

But seriously, how much does the beginning of this song sound like Jesse’s Girl? A lot is the answer.

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Let’s Talk About: Halloween Costumes

We struggle greatly with Halloween costumes and we’re sure we’re not the only one. Today, Julia and I explore why exactly it is that we struggle so much and give some totally helpful Halloween ideas. Continue reading

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Let’s Talk About… Television

Julia: I know that I wrote a huge blog post a while ago about all the shows that are new this season, but to be honest the only shows that I actually bother to keep up with are Mindy Project and the Mentalist. I find that the Mindy Project has just the right amount of awkwardness, parody, and humour. I know everybody loves New Girl and I might be the only person in the world who thinks this way, but Jess is too awkward, and the boys are extreme parodies. I don’t believe, nor can I relate to, any of it. And the Mentalist… well it’s pure gold, there’s no debate about that.

Hilary: Yes, I feel the same way and, as a result, I have been watching a lot of British panel shows, which you know, because we watch them together most of the time. Part of me really wants there to be Canadian panel shows, but then I think that maybe they wouldn’t be quite as good. There’s just something about the British that makes them excellent at sitting around tables with a small number of other British people and having hilarious conversations.

Julia: I think the closest thing in Canada we have to a panel show like QI, or Was it Something I Said would be Dragons’ Den or Match Game. In which case, better left to the Brits, I say. Though, I wouldn’t mind seeing a panel consisting of Russell Peters, Rick Mercer and Michael Buble. Also, when I was typing out Michael Buble’s name I almost called him Sean. I have absolutely no idea why. Sean Buble, that well known crooner.

Hilary: I agree, better left to the Brits. I think my favourite panel show right now is Was it Something I Said, if only because Richard Ayoade and David Mitchell are two of my favourite panel show type folk. They’re both quite clever and deadpan, which I think is something I really relate to. QI is always a solid standby and I am quite fond of Never Mind the Buzzcocks. That having been said, my ultimate favourite episode of NMTB is the episode when Richard Ayoade guest hosts. On the other hand, the one where Martin Freeman guest hosts is a close second.

Julia: I think that I have to disagree, and argue that the best episode of NMTB is when Josh Grobin is on the panel. That was the best moment in panel show history for me. I also really liked Would I Lie to You mostly because Rob Brydon would constantly try and take things off track so he could do a Sean Connery impersonation.

Hilary: Okay, yes, that was pretty hilarious. But the conversation between Richard Ayoade and Ed Sheeran is so funny! And it fills my cold, black heart with joy. I like Would I Lie to You because Lee Mack is constantly making fun of David Mitchell for being pompous. Now, would we consider Big Fat Quiz of the Year a panel show? Because that’s always a treat. They’re quite lengthy and usually only happen once per year after New Year’s, but they’re pretty entertaining. Alan Carr is delightful.

Julia: Oh my gosh I love Alan Carr. I know that he has a talk show and not a panel show but he’s actually delightful. When he had Adele on it melted my cold black heart with joy because they just chatted away like the best friends they are. In real life!

Hilary: Another British show I’m quite fond of currently is Gadget Man. It’s in its second season right now. Last season, it was hosted by Stephen Fry, which was probably lovely, but I didn’t know it existed then. Now it’s being hosted by Richard Ayoade and it’s just the best. It’s all about technology and, as the name would suggest, gadgets, which doesn’t seem all that interesting at first, but it’s Richard Ayoade (I now feel a bit like an obsessive fangirl because I’ve talked about Richard Ayoade so much in this post, but I swear it’s valid). Also, he invites other hilarious British celebrity friends on to help him test the gadgets. He and Noel Fielding take a vacation to a beach in the south of France together. Adorable.

Julia: Adorable indeed. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: I wish we had 4 Channel. Or at least the BBC.

Hilary: And not the Canadian version of the BBC (no, not CBC, but the actual BBC Canada) because all they really play is Graham Norton, and as entertaining as he is, it’s just not the same as QI. In slightly related news, I have officially given up on Hollyoaks. It’s the end of an era, Julia. They have literally killed off or gotten rid of every character that I actually cared about and now it’s just not worth it.

Julia: Ah Hollyoaks. I checked out when Carmel and the gambling priest didn’t get together – you lasted a surprisingly long time! Also, while we’re on the topic, if anybody is concerned, I’m still working my way through Chuck. I have Friday off and have plans to do nothing but become re-obsessed. I’m excited.

Hilary: I look forward to returning home to find you on a couch somewhere, totally engrossed and antsy. I think Chuck might have the same effect on you as caffeine does. It might even be worse. Minus the paranoia.

Julia: Yes, much less paranoia, much more love. I mean caffeine is great, but it’s got nothing on nerdy, affable, loveable spies.

Hilary: Or Richard Ayoade.

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Let’s talk about… dessert

Today, Hilary and I discussed various desserts, because we were at a total loss of what else to talk about, and because we haven’t got enough political savvy to talk about the American government shutdown without simply stating: “what the fridge Amurica?” So now that that clever commentary is out of the way, on to the sweet stuff… Continue reading

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Let’s Talk About…Sherlock

We talked about Sherlock an age ago, but since we’re not letting our lack of internet hold us back, we’re posting it now. There are hilarious pictures in this one. You’re welcome. Continue reading

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Let’s Talk About How Boring Harry Potter Would’ve Been with the Two of Us

Last night, Julia and I watched the sixth Harry Potter movie. For those of you who live under a rock and don’t know, that’s  Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. I don’t know why I chose that one specifically, but I did. So deal with it. In any case, Julia made the comment that, if she was in the place of Harry, nothing would ever have happened because the majority of the things that he does is not something she would ever consider doing. And I agree. Continue reading

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Let’s Talk About … the funny/cute scale

On Sunday Hilary and I went to see We’re the Millers which was rather funny, and a good watch all round. But it got us thinking about guys who are just so much cuter because they’re funny. Continue reading

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Let’s Talk About … Orlando Bloom and Batman

Today on the radio Hilary heard that Orlando Bloom is a favourite to play Batman in the Superman and Justice League series. Now this we had to talk about! Continue reading

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Let’s Talk About…Downton Abbey

I’ve recently been lent the first two seasons of Downton Abbey. I had been told by numerous people that I needed to watch it because it was “soooo good”. So I’ve finally bitten the bullet. Julia and I watched the first four episodes yesterday afternoon. Now let’s talk about it. Continue reading

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